I’ve been a fan of horror and science fiction movies for as long as I can remember. As a kid growing up in the 80’s I had access to every good and bad movie that cable would show. It didn’t matter what it was; if it had explosions, mutants and cool vehicles, I’d watch it. A genre that became one of my favorite was the post apocalyptic scenario.

Mad Max 2 or The Road Warrior was my introduction. I think it was the oil pump fortress that really drew me in; old cars made up the walls, a bus with sheet metal served as the front gate and makeshift flame throwers that protected the occupants and the gasoline.

Another movie that had a fortress setting was George Romero’s Night of the Living Dead and he continued with that in Dawn of the Dead.

Both of these movie took place in a limited amount of time; Mad Max was about a week. Night of the Living Dead was, well a night. It wasn’t until Dawn of the Dead that I began to notice something; people are pretty in the post apocalypse.

In Mad Max, our hero wore a bad ass outfit, which of course every hero needs. Max’s outfit was a symbol of the injuries he sustained during mad max 1.

Let’s look at the other characters. First off, Wez played by Vernon Wells.

I can see why people would use football gear as makeshift armor. It’s readily available and does offer protection. Wez has given his armor a personal touch; the feathers on the collar and the silver shoulder plate. Personally I would just grab armor and use it as is. Painting or decorating would seem a waste in a real PA. also, the mohawk; a real vanity. He keeps his head shaved smooth and dyes it with the blood from his victims?

Another character is the warrior woman, played by Virginia Hey.

Here, the warrior woman has not decorated her armor, but has gone with an off white color scheme. A definite fashion choice completely unnecessary in the post apocalypse.

I see why the creative team gave these costumes to the characters; to make them recognizable and rememberable to the audience. 

George Romero’s Dawn of the Dead was a metaphor for American consumerism and the popularity of the mall. The heroes of the movie fortify themselves in a large mall consisting of the stores needed for them to survive. They had clothes and food and were able to decorate their rooms with furniture, but where did they shower? There was one scene when Fran was vomiting from her morning sickness in a bathroom, but I only saw a toilet and sink. It seemed more of a bathroom for the maintenance staff to use. Another scene Fran was giving Stephen a haircut, keeping him pretty in the post apocalypse.

Zack Snyder’s Dawn of the Dead had the same issue for me; how did everyone manage to stay clean? At the beginning of the movie, Sarah Polley’s character tends to her bitten spouse’s wounds and is covered in blood. Sure she washes her hands in the fountain, but what about the rest of the blood on her?

Kim Poirier’s character has curly hair that looks great the entire time they’re trapped in the mall. I can only assume this is after several days in the mall cause of the musical montage they had.

One of the more unbelievable examples of staying clean after the apocalypse is the Book of Eli. In the trailer Denzel Washington’s mentions that he has been traveling for 30 winters. Now even if that isn’t 30 years, are you telling me that he kept those pearly whites?

The bad guys are all dirty and disgusting so you’d feel less for them when they got killed.

Mila Kunis sure looked cute as well.

You’d think a women would do her best to avoid looking attractive in a world with no laws or government protection.

This new show from JJ Abrams really got me to write this (hopefully before anyone else does) because of the premise.

All the power in the world goes out and the story picks up 15 years later… everyone sure looks damn good. The men all clean shaven, the women’s hair looks great. The clothes right off the rack.

I have running water, electricity and toiletries; yet several hours later, I have a five o’clock shadow.

The only book and movie that got it right was The Road. My favorite scene in the movie was when the father and son were washing off after finding the bomb shelter. 

This was to entertain and hopefully make the readers more aware of Hollywood’s influence on keeping it’s stars looking pretty in the post apocalypse.

Images were taken from the internet; if they belong to you and would like them removed, please contact me.